Insights into helping a loved one preplan

From personal experience, we share some thoughts about accompanying a loved one through the process of making funeral or cremation arrangements ahead of time.

Through preplanning, your loved one will make decisions about the types of service they want you to hold in their honor after they are gone, and create a written record of their choices. This will serve as a plan for you to follow when the time comes. Preplanning brings great peace of mind when it is completed, but can be intimidating to start. Here’s what we learned when accompanying a loved one through preplanning.

Expect all of the feelings. There’s no way around it; emotions are going to surface as you accompany a loved one who is preplanning. A desire to keep them with you forever and not think about the time when you will say a final goodbye to them is completely normal and natural. But the reality is, when that time comes, you will be incredibly grateful that it was all planned out ahead of time and you knew what to expect. There will be enough to manage at the time, emotionally, financially and relationally with your remaining family that you will be relieved to not have to make all these decisions as well. Give yourself and your loved one time and space to work through the emotions, and remember that while it is difficult, simply being there for them as they make their plans is a true gift – for you both.

It is a balance. Preplanning arrangements are a balance of what your loved one wants for themselves, and what they want for you. While they will not be present when their plans are carried out, and could be tempted to say “Well, I won’t be there to care”, most people will want to know that their services will be as easy as possible on their family members. They might also want your reassurance and support for their choices, so it’s okay to express your own opinions, as long as the final choices are your loved one’s.

There will be surprises. Your loved one will probably make decisions that surprise you. Whether it is the type of service they want, firm ideas about what they do NOT want, or the selection of things like music, an urn, or flowers, chances are very good that they will make choices that are different than the ones you would have made at the time of need. This is great because it means that they are doing what is uniquely right for them.

You will learn a lot. No matter how close you are to your loved one, you will learn more about them when you walk with them through preplanning. Whether it is the choices they make, the stories they share, or simply the experience of working through such a personal matter, you may feel even closer to them than before.

Sharing with others is an important step. Supporting your loved one as they share their plan and decisions with other family members is important. It may be hard for them to introduce the topic, because when is really a “good” time to talk about one’s death? They might want you to help them share the information with other family members. But once the discussions are had and everyone knows what to expect, it will be a true relief.

A few last thoughts. First, while a written plan is wonderful, having everything paid for is even better. The funeral home staff member that you meet with will be able to explain payment options so your loved one can decide how to handle the financial aspects. Second, after the appointment, you will both need a break from the heavy topic, so consider taking them out to lunch! And finally, and perhaps most importantly, by the end of the process, your dominant feeling, and your loved one’s, will almost certainly be relief and peace of mind.

We truly understand that this process is intimidating, and it can be hard to get started. But our preplanning associates are always here to help, with no pressure. Please give us a call today if you or a loved one need to take the first step towards peace of mind.

April 13, 2026
In recent years, the phrase “celebration of life” has become more common when families are planning services for a loved one. While many people have heard the term, there can still be confusion about what it truly means and how it differs from a traditional funeral. At its heart, a celebration of life is not about replacing tradition, but about offering a more flexible, personalized way to honor and remember a life. A celebration of life is a personalized service that focuses on honoring the unique story, personality, and legacy of the individual who has passed. While it can be held in a variety of locations, many families choose to gather in the comfort of a funeral home chapel, where they have both guidance and the ability to customize the experience. These services most often take place after cremation, which allows families more time to plan and create a meaningful tribute. However, every family’s preferences are different, and services can be arranged in whatever way feels most appropriate. No two celebrations of life are exactly the same, because no two lives are the same. One of the most meaningful aspects of a celebration of life is the ability to incorporate personal touches that reflect the life being honored, even within a chapel setting. Families may choose to include themed elements that represent a loved one’s passions, hobbies, or personality. This could be as simple as displaying favorite photos and memorabilia, or as unique as incorporating colors, music, or décor that reflect what they loved most in life. Memory tables, tribute videos, and customized music selections can all be seamlessly incorporated into a chapel service. Some families also invite guests to participate by sharing stories or bringing items that hold special meaning. This blend of personalization within a supportive, structured environment often provides both comfort and creativity during a difficult time. A celebration of life offers families the opportunity to gather in a familiar, supportive setting while creating a service that truly reflects their loved one. By combining the comfort of a chapel with the flexibility of personalization, it becomes a meaningful way to honor a life and share memories with those who matter most. There is no right or wrong way to plan a service. The most important thing is creating a space that feels genuine, supportive, and reflective of the person being remembered.
March 2, 2026
Many of us take our freedoms for granted, but our staff proudly acknowledges the sacrifices made by those who have served our country through their patriotism, love of country and willingness to protect others. We are committed to providing quality service and professional assistance to help families complete the necessary forms to obtain benefits that are provided through the United States Department of Veterans Affairs (VA). Here are some frequently-asked questions about benefits. What kinds of benefits are available? Granted to eligible Veterans in appreciation for the service they have provided for our country, benefits can include a burial allowance to help cover the burial, funeral and transportation costs associated with the deceased’s services and disposition. For those being buried in a national cemetery, survivors can receive assistance with the burial and funeral costs, the plot or internment, and the transporting of the veteran’s remains for burial. Additionally, Veterans may be eligible for a military funeral honors and committal service, and memorial items such as a cemetery headstone, marker, medallion, Presidential Memorial Certificate, plaque, or urn. Specific qualifications will need to be met to receive these benefits and memorial items. Who qualifies for burial benefits and burial in a national cemetery? Veterans, service members, spouses, and dependents may be eligible for burial in a VA national cemetery, as well as other benefits, if they meet one of the general requirements listed below. For complete requirements, please visit the VA burials and benefits page , and find a local VA national cemetery here . · A veteran who didn’t receive a dishonorable discharge · A service member who died while on active duty, active duty for training, or inactive duty for training · The spouse or minor child of a veteran, even if the veteran died first · In some cases, the unmarried adult dependent child of a veteran What are military funeral honors and a committal service? Military funeral honors include the playing of “Taps,” a rifle detail, a color guard and uniformed service members who properly fold and present the United States flag to the grieving family. These flags are typically given to the deceased’s next of kin or close friend. In order for the survivors to qualify to receive the burial flag, the veteran or reservist must be described by at least one of the following: · Served in wartime · Died while serving on active duty after May 27, 1941 · Served after January 31, 1955 · Served in peacetime and left military service before June 27, 1950, after serving at least one enlistment or because of a disability that was caused - or made worse - by their active military service · Served in the Selected Reserves, or served in the military forces of the Philippines while in service of the United States and died on or after April 25, 1951. As a Veteran, how do I apply for benefits? You can apply to find out in advance if you’re eligible for burial in a VA national cemetery. This is called a pre-need determination of eligibility—and it can help make the burial planning process easier for your family members in their time of need. Learn how to apply for a preneed determination of eligibility. As a surviving family member, how do I apply for benefits? As a surviving family member, you must file a claim for a non-service-connected burial allowance within two years after the veteran’s burial or cremation. There is no time limit to file for a service-connected burial, plot or interment allowance. You can apply online or by mail after completing the VA Form 21P-530. A veteran who didn’t receive a dishonorable discharge or a service member who died while on active duty may be eligible for a headstone or marker if they meet certain requirements. To find out if your deceased loved one qualifies for a cemetery marker and to apply, visit this site . For more information regarding VA burial benefits and memorial items, visit the VA's website or call the VA office at 1-800-827-1000.
February 2, 2026
Inflation affects nearly every part of daily life, from groceries and utilities to health care and housing. One area that is often overlooked is funeral and cremation planning. Like most services, these costs tend to increase over time. Preplanning provides a thoughtful way to prepare while reducing both financial and emotional stress in the future. More people are choosing to make arrangements in advance, not only to ensure their wishes are clearly known, but also to help protect their families from rising costs and difficult decisions during an already emotional time. The Reality of Rising Costs Funeral and cremation services include many components influenced by inflation, such as professional care, facilities, transportation, materials, and regulatory requirements. As these expenses increase, waiting to make arrangements can result in higher costs for families who may be unprepared to manage them, both emotionally and financially. Planning ahead allows you to make decisions calmly and deliberately, rather than facing rushed choices during a time of loss. Addressing Today’s Prices One benefit many people appreciate about preplanning is the ability to address pricing in advance and reduce uncertainty about future costs. Preplanned arrangements may be funded in full or paid over time, giving you the flexibility to choose an option that fits your budget and personal situation. This approach helps make planning more approachable and manageable. To help protect pricing, arrangements are typically financially secured through full payment or an approved payment plan. This helps ensure that the services you choose today remain in place in the future, even as costs change. Reducing Financial Stress for Loved Ones One of the most meaningful benefits of preplanning is the consideration it shows for those you care about. When a death occurs, families are often required to make many decisions in a short amount of time. Having arrangements already in place removes much of that burden. By planning ahead, you relieve your loved ones from financial uncertainty and clearly document your wishes. This allows them to focus on honoring your life and supporting one another instead of worrying about costs or decisions. A Thoughtful Part of Long Term Planning Preplanning final arrangements is similar to creating a will or setting aside savings. It is an important step in long term planning. It gives you the opportunity to take control, ask questions, and make informed choices without pressure. Many people find comfort in knowing their plans are documented, their preferences are clear, and inflation is less likely to affect the value of the arrangements they have chosen. Peace of Mind for Today and Tomorrow Ultimately, preplanning is about peace of mind. It provides reassurance that your wishes are understood, your family is supported, and important details are handled thoughtfully.  If you have been considering planning ahead, our team is here to share information, explain options, and answer questions whenever you are ready. A simple conversation today can bring comfort and confidence for years to come.
memorial gathering with cremation urn
September 10, 2025
When you are considering cremation, it is important to understand the safeguards that each provider has in place to maintain the integrity of the cremation process.
More Posts »

More Resources & Support