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Grief and Gratitude

Can we grieve loss while still feeling gratitude for the goodness in our lives?

After we experience a loss, we tend to focus on what we no longer have. As a result, we focus on what is missing in our life, rather than all the wonderful things we still have. Finding gratitude in our everyday lives can help us see our situations in ways that can lessen anxiety and help us cope with grief.

Here are some ways you can practice gratitude:

Keep a gratitude journal - Start by giving thanks for one thing each day. Nothing is too big or too small. If it comes to your mind, it is worth writing down. It is amazing when you look back to see how much can change over time.

Give at least one compliment daily - It can be to a person, or it can be asking someone to share your appreciation of something else, like asking “Isn’t it a beautiful day?” Don’t forget that you can always compliment yourself. Self-love is the first step into loving others and the world around you.

Practice mindfulness to appreciate each moment - Focus on the present moment and what’s all around you. Use all of your senses: What do you see, feel, hear, smell, or taste? This practice helps ground you in the present and can loosen the grip of darker emotions for a time.

It may be hard at first especially when you do not feel grateful for anything. Start small, maybe you can be grateful for your morning coffee, a warm meal, or a good song. It is noticing the small things that we take for granted and being aware of the world around us that can help shift our focus from grief. Grief isn’t something to get over. Without the deep love and connection we’ve had with those we’ve lost, we wouldn’t be grieving. Gratitude has the power to help those in mourning rise above a loss providing hope and moments of grace.

A white candle and a white flower on a wooden table.
12 Jul, 2024
Funerals are deeply emotional events, offering a chance for friends and family to mourn their loss and celebrate the life of a loved one.
A white flower and a lit candle on a wooden table.
12 Jul, 2024
Performing acts of kindness in your loved one's name is a beautiful way to honor their memory. Whether it's volunteering, donating to a charity they cared about, or simply helping someone in need, these acts can create a positive impact in their honor. Visit a Place of Significance Spending time at a location that held significance for your loved one can be a profound way to feel close to them. This could be a park they loved, a beach they frequented, or any place that brings back cherished memories. Create a Memory Box or Scrapbook Collecting photos, letters, and mementos into a memory box or scrapbook can be a therapeutic way to keep their memory alive. This personal collection can be revisited each year, allowing you to reflect on the good times and keep their spirit close. Plant a Tree or Garden Planting a tree or dedicating a garden in their memory creates a living tribute that grows and thrives over time. This act not only commemorates their life but also contributes to the environment, symbolizing life and growth. Host a Memorial Event or Fundraiser Organizing an event or fundraiser in their name can both honor their memory and support a cause they were passionate about. This could be a walk, run, or a simple gathering where donations are collected for a chosen charity. Write a Letter Writing a letter to your loved one can be a powerful way to express your feelings and maintain a sense of connection. Share your thoughts, updates about your life, and reflections on their impact. This can be kept in a special place or read aloud at a memorial gathering. Engage in a Hobby or Activity They Loved Participating in an activity that your loved one enjoyed can be a meaningful way to feel close to them. Whether it’s cooking their favorite recipe, listening to their favorite music, or continuing a hobby they were passionate about, these actions help keep their spirit alive in your daily life. Use Social Media to Share Memories Social media platforms can be a modern way to share memories and connect with others who are also remembering your loved one. Posting photos, stories, or a simple tribute can create a virtual space for and celebration. Remembering a loved one on the anniversary of their death is a deeply personal and meaningful act. Whether through quiet reflection, collective remembrance, or acts of kindness, each gesture honors their legacy and keeps their memory alive. The most important thing is to choose what feels right for you, allowing yourself the space to grieve and celebrate in a way that brings comfort and peace.
The wedding rings are sitting on top of a bouquet of roses.
12 Jul, 2024
A wedding is a joyous celebration of love and union, but it can also be bittersweet when a beloved family member or friend is no longer with us to share in the moment. Honoring a deceased loved one at your wedding is a beautiful way to keep their memory alive and include them in your special day. Here are some heartfelt ideas to consider. Reserved Seat Set a seat at the ceremony reserved in their honor. Decorate it with a flower, a framed photo, or a personal item that belonged to them. This gesture creates a tangible presence and acknowledges their importance in your life. Incorporate Their Favorite Flowers Include their favorite flowers in your bouquet, boutonnieres, or centerpieces. This subtle yet meaningful detail can bring a sense of connection and remind you of their love and personality. Memory Table Create a memory table featuring photos, keepsakes, and mementos of your loved one. This dedicated space allows guests to remember and celebrate their life. You can also include a guest book for attendees to share their memories and thoughts. Light a Candle Light a candle in their memory during the ceremony or reception. This simple act symbolizes their spirit and the light they brought into your life. You might also ask close family members to join in lighting the candle, making it a communal moment of remembrance. Play Their Favorite Song Incorporate their favorite song into the ceremony or reception playlist. Whether it’s a song they loved or one that reminds you of them, this musical tribute can evoke cherished memories and bring a sense of closeness. Wear Something of Theirs Wear a piece of jewelry, a handkerchief, or another personal item that belonged to them. This intimate way of honoring their memory keeps them close to you throughout your special day. Share a Special Reading or Poem During the ceremony, have a family member or friend read a poem, scripture, or passage that was significant to your loved one. This can be a poignant way to include their voice and values in your wedding. Personal Vows or Toast In your vows or during a toast, share a personal story or mention how your loved one influenced your life and relationship. This heartfelt acknowledgment can be a powerful tribute to their lasting impact. Memory Charms or Tokens Attach memory charms or tokens to your bouquet, boutonniere, or clothing. These small, discreet items can carry a profound sense of connection and remembrance. Honoring a deceased loved one at your wedding is a deeply personal and meaningful way to include their memory in your celebration. Whether through a reserved seat, a memory table, or a simple candle lighting, these gestures can help you feel their presence and share their spirit with your guests. Remember, it’s the love and memories you hold that truly make these moments special.
A bouquet of pink roses is sitting on top of a piano keyboard.
12 Jul, 2024
In moments of grief and loss, music has a unique ability to comfort and console, offering solace when words fail. Funeral services often harness the power of music to evoke memories, express emotions, and honor the life of the departed. Across cultures and traditions, certain songs have become emblematic choices for these solemn occasions. Let's explore some of the most common songs that resonate deeply within funeral services. "Amazing Grace" Dating back to the 18th century, "Amazing Grace" has transcended its origins as a Christian hymn to become a universal anthem of solace and redemption. It’s simple yet profound lyrics, coupled with a hauntingly beautiful melody, make it a timeless choice for funerals, offering a message of hope and divine mercy in the face of mortality. "Hallelujah" by Leonard Cohen Leonard Cohen's masterpiece, "Hallelujah," is a poignant meditation on love, loss, and the human condition. This song has found resonance in funeral services worldwide, its verses reflecting the complexity of emotions experienced in times of mourning and remembrance. "Over the Rainbow" by Israel Kamakawiwo?ole Israel Kamakawiwo?ole's soulful rendition of "Over the Rainbow" has become synonymous with peace and tranquility, making it a popular choice for funerals. Its gentle ukulele accompaniment and soothing vocals offer a sense of comfort and nostalgia, inviting listeners to envision a world beyond earthly sorrows. "My Way" by Frank Sinatra Frank Sinatra's iconic anthem, "My Way," embodies the spirit of individuality and self-determination. Often chosen to commemorate a life lived on one's own terms, this song celebrates personal triumphs and reflects on the journey of a loved one who embraced life with courage and conviction. "Time to Say Goodbye" by Andrea Bocelli and Sarah Brightman With its soaring operatic vocals and sweeping orchestration, "Time to Say Goodbye" captures the bittersweet essence of parting. Originally performed as a duet by Andrea Bocelli and Sarah Brightman, this poignant ballad resonates deeply in funeral services, offering a poignant farewell to cherished loved ones. "Ave Maria" by Franz Schubert Franz Schubert's "Ave Maria" is a timeless invocation of divine grace and comfort. Its serene melody and sacred lyrics have made it a staple of funeral services, offering solace and spiritual reassurance to those grieving the loss of a loved one. "Wind Beneath My Wings" by Bette Midler Bette Midler's heartfelt tribute, "Wind Beneath My Wings," celebrates the profound impact of a loved one's support and guidance. Often chosen to honor the memory of parents, mentors, or friends, this song acknowledges the selfless acts of love that uplift and inspire us. In the tapestry of funeral services, these songs serve as poignant reminders of love, loss, and the enduring power of music to heal and uplift the human spirit. Whether through hymns of faith, soul-stirring ballads, or heartfelt tributes, these melodies offer solace and comfort to those bidding farewell to cherished loved ones, their echoes lingering long after the final notes have faded away.
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